Show up anyway: A request during this pandemic
These past few weeks have rocked us. Our entire world has been thrown off its axis and we’re all trying to figure out how to navigate this unstable ground. I’ve struggled to manage the waves of anxiety, sadness, and utter gratitude. But mostly, I’ve grappled with how I can best serve during this time. Truthfully, the pressure I put on myself has been magnified and it’s left me feeling paralyzed. The more I tried to figure out how to serve, the less I was actually serving. In between FaceTiming with athletes and making sure my family is taken care of, I’ve stumbled under the weight of this global crisis. While I think it’s critical to feel all the feels, I also need to ask of myself what I’m asking from everyone else: feel all the feels and show up anyway. That’s resilience.
Every single one of us has something to offer. It may not be a colossal sacrifice, it may not be a grand philanthropic gesture, and it certainly doesn’t have to be perfect. But, you have something to offer and that’s what the world needs right now. Whether you’re carrying a torch on the front lines of this pandemic, or you’re holding a single match that only illuminates the space around you, your light is needed.
What if I told you that the constellation of emotions you’re experiencing are important for your evolution - and that by sharing them, you’re guiding everyone who’s struggling? What if I told you that it’s less about achieving some arbitrary level of mental strength and more about working the process? What if I told you that your presence, alone, is your greatest offering?
These are the permissions I’m finally granting myself - but goodness, it’s taken a while to get here. Week 1 of physical distancing had me in a state of shock, overwhelm, anxiety, and helplessness. Life was being canceled and pre-traumatic stress was widespread. Week 2 triggered a huge sense of personal responsibility and a lot of tears. How could I best support the athletes I work with? How can I share what I’ve learned to help illuminate the global darkness? How can I keep my family healthy and steadfastly commit to cultivating joy, presence, and some sense of normalcy? The responsibility I felt was profound . . .
. . . and then I had a realization.
I remind athletes every day about the importance of showing up. It doesn’t matter that they’re feeling less than 100% or that they aren’t performing to the levels of their expectations. That’s not what it’s about. It’s about showing up day in and day out regardless of how you’re feeling. As my mentor always said, if you only have 50% of yourself to give, then give 100% of that 50%. If you only have 10% to give on a specific day, then give 100% of that 10%. Life is messy, difficult, and fleeting. Acknowledge that striving for perfection is paralyzing and that emotions are a beautiful part of being human. Then, show up anyway.
I relate to the elite athletes I work with because I, too, put a tremendous amount of pressure on myself. I always have. While that quality has served me in some ways, it has also hindered me in others. I often feel like anything I create has to be perfect before I offer it up to the world (which, I get, is an impossible and ridiculous goal). I used to feel that I had to master my mind before guiding others to master theirs. I want to be an amazing mom, an incredible wife, a supportive friend, and a badass businesswoman every day of my life. But, here’s the thing: no one has ever asked that of me. By striving for peak performance in all of my roles, I’m actually doing a disservice to myself, to my tribe, and to the world. Does that resonate with you?
Sport tests resilience and this pandemic is testing us all. Does a committed athlete show up to practice, train, or compete even when they don’t feel like it? Yes. Do you, as an imperfect human being, show up even when you’re feeling overwhelmed, emotionally drained and uncertain? If you answered “yes”, then bravo - you’re embodying this lesson and showing up anyway. If you answered, “meh”, then I suggest you practice these three steps:
Every morning, acknowledge where you are physically, mentally, and spiritually. Don’t judge the state you’re in; just notice.
During the day, commit to giving something of yourself. If you’re completely drained, send a “heart” emoji to a loved one or practice radical self-care and acceptance. If you’re in a higher vibe state, cook a new recipe for your family or take an online workout class to support a local teacher or studio. If you’re feeling really good, seize that fleeting emotion, embrace vulnerability, and put yourself out there (virtually, of course) for the greater good. Your only goal is to recognize that you have something to offer - to either yourself or to your community - and then to share it.
Every evening, honor yourself for abandoning perfection, embracing messiness, and showing up anyway - in whatever capacity you were able.
As we collectively move through this painful period of history, we’re all being called upon to show up. But here’s the thing, don’t get so caught up in figuring out how to have the greatest impact that you fail to show up at all. Right now, the world needs your light, no matter how dimly lit you may feel that it is. Breathe through the magnitude of this crisis and show up anyway. I promise you that I will.